Why Getting Frustrated is a Good Thing

My fabulous friend Jordan Reeves, a founding member of The Story Cure online storytelling community, recently sent me this video of Dr. Becky speaking to students at Duke University. 

If you aren’t familiar with Dr. Becky Kennedy, she’s quickly risen to global fame as a parenting expert–and I love her advice about viewing every kid and every parent as fundamentally Good Inside (the title of her podcast). 

But this video isn’t about parenting. It’s about, well… Writing. 

Okay, not really specifically about writing. It’s about learning any new skill. But it sure is relevant to writing and creating!

In between the start, the not knowing, and the finish, the knowing, is the messy middle. We’ve all been here. It’s where you experience ups and downs—whether you’re first learning to read, or writing your first college essay. 

What I love about the Dr. Becky video is she defines this messy middle as being filled with one emotion more than any other: 

Frustration.

And guess what? We don’t like being frustrated. We want it to be over, fast!

In fact, all too often, the feeling of frustration causes us to quit. We give up completely. 
 

But frustration is where we learn. Frustration is where we do the work. Frustration is what it takes to make progress.

Indeed. A wonderful lesson for writing – and for parenting, too! Can you relate?

Aloha,

MeiMei

Tip of the Week: Embrace Your Frustration

You will get frustrated when writing a book, a poem, an essay, a documentary film, or engaging in any creative task. 

• Rather than allowing that to stop you, breathe into it. Feel the frustrating. Let it simmer.
• Then let it go.
• Focus not on the endpoint, but on the journey. Remind yourself: I am learning. I am creating! I am doing it, one small step at a time. 

Quote of the Week

The Learning Space has one feeling associated with it: Frustration.

• Dr. Becky